Smile of the Day

Life is getting much too serious, yes? Who doesn't need a daily smile?

Wednesday, September 13

Tips for surviving university

  • Minimise food budget by scheduling classes around Happy Hour.
  • College-level algebra: 5 returnable bottles = 1 delicious Ramen Noodle dinner.
  • Enjoy being a sophomore: it will be the best three years of your life.
  • "I Phelta Thi" is not a real fraternity, except at state colleges.
  • Boring lecture? Start a wave!
  • Wear an athletic cup to panty raids, because it is all fun and games until someone loses their 'nads.
  • If an 8:00 am class is required for your major, change your major.
  • Lemon juice and baking soda make an excellent bong water stain remover.
  • Football games were never meant to be observed by sober people.
  • Earn extra cash by parlaying chemistry knowledge into lucrative "home pharmaceuticals" business.
  • Clever margin manipulation can turn a 4-page outline into a 100-page senior essay.
  • Don't think of it as sleeping with your professor; think of it as "acing biology".
  • In a pinch, milk can be used as a beer substitute in your breakfast cereal.


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