Smile of the Day

Life is getting much too serious, yes? Who doesn't need a daily smile?

Monday, January 8

Dilbert's words of wisdom

  • I can only please one person per day. Today is not your day ... tomorrow is not looking good either.
  • I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by.
  • Tell me what you need, and I'll tell you how to get along without it.
  • Accept that some days you are the pigeon and some days the statue.
  • Needing someone is like needing a parachute. If he is not there the first time, chances are you will not be needing him again.
  • I don't have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.
  • Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling?
  • My reality cheque bounced.
  • On the keyboard of life, always keep one finger on the escape key.
  • I don't suffer from stress. I am a carrier.
  • You are slower than a herd of turtles stampeding through peanut butter.
  • Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, because you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.
  • Everybody is somebody else's weirdo.
  • Never argue with an idiot. They drag you down to their level, then beat you with experience.


Anonymous froo froo said...

hahaha! I love these!

3:01 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

this is so funny!the highlight of my day!!! :)

10:10 PM  
Blogger the shrewness said...

too freaking funny indeed!

11:04 PM  

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