Twisted home remedies
- When choking on an ice cube, simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat. Presto! The blockage will instantly remove itself.
- Avoid cutting yourself slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold while you chop.
- Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink.
- To treat high blood pressure: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. (Remember to use a timer.)
- A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.
- If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives. Then you will be too afraid to cough.